"School report"
"Why did you turn in a blank test paper for maths?"
- My little kitten! - Well, Madame...
If your daddy sent you, tell him to come himself.
I won't eat him, little kitten.
- What does the little kitten want? - His daddy sent him!
He's cute! What's your name?
Don't be afraid... What does daddy want?
I'm not afraid! It's not for my father... Shit!
What did you say to her?
You're too young to hear it.
Up yours, blowhard! She wouldn't have you...
Don't worry about the crossing, Madame.
Mr Lawn, here are the... This is important!
Jean-Luc's prescriptions. He mustn't over do it bathing in the sea
and he mustn't over-exert himself at sports. That's because his TB test
was only in May. Is the English family respectable?
Don't forget to remind him he's not to sleep with a quilt or a pillow.
Nothing with feathers... he has asthma.
And only cotton blankets because of his rash.
I did very well in French!
That's not what concerns me, I'm waiting for the maths results.
Do they eat much seafood?
Ah, no no.
Don't eat any, darling, refuse politely. Understand? But don't eat any!
That's all well and good, Julien.
But you're going to England to learn English.
Have fun but remember that's secondary. Agreed?
If you have any problems, just tell Mr Lawn... That's what he's there for.
- Right, Mr Lawn? - Of course, Madame.
My dearest darling. Bless you, I'll miss you... Be careful!
That's a nervous laugh. Don't do anything stupid! I entrust him to you, Mr Lawn.
If there's a problem, write me. Write me immediately.
Of course, Madame.
Remember, draughts are bad for asthma too.
Félix!
Keruelot!
Juvenelle!
Your grades aren't in yet...
I trust that you've earned this vacation.
Well, have a good time.
We'll miss you during these 4 weeks. Write to us!
- Hi, Morin. - Hi, how are you?
I ditched my mother giving Lawn a snow job.
That your old man?
I'm a bit scared letting mine go like that.
I hear Mr Lawn is very good.
I know him well, he's a remarkable man.
It's good for boys their age to discover the world.
It's an experience.
Mollycoddling is dangerous... right?
Swiped from your dad?
Talk about pollution! Can we open a window?
Can't you virgins stand smoke? Better get used to it.
Or English girls will make fun of you.
But Morin'll make out, with his looks!
Up my what? Me, a jerk?
Cut out the bullshit.
My mother sold what to the Germans during the war?
I was 11 when I laid my first broad. Hear that, Morin? Eleven!
But that takes virility... see what I mean?
Talk is cheap... I'll wait and see.
Okay, Morin, you'll see. We'll have a ball.
- I'll show you how. - Up my what?
Again? Change the record, for shit's sake!
The English pudding tastes good!
Drugs are good, huh?
Nice bag!
Is that lemon?
Cool it! It's Lawn...
I don't understand.
All right. I'll continue in French.
Mr Lavigier will take care of Group B.
I'm sure you'll get along well with him.
Afternoons, he'll be on the beach.
Our cabin is number 73. Remember that number... 73.
I'll take care of Group A personally. It seems they're the best,
though not necessarily the oldest. Right, Talimard?
Talimard, that's enough! No more insolence!
If you continue to be a smart-aleck,
you'll take the next boat home.
You goofed.
It's exactly 9:55. You have 5 minutes
to get ready and settle in.
- Up my what? - Me, a jerk?
Well, virigns? Not scared without mum and dad?
Drop it.
Let's go.
Come on.
If they want trouble...
If they want trouble, then I'm off.
- That guy is a real girl! - Really bugs me!
- Bye, Jules! - See you later.
Silence, please! Stop shoving. Line up in two rows.
I'll call you in alphabetical order anyway, so don't push!
Remember this is your pocket money for the week.
5 pounds eachs, plus one pound for bus riders.
Astopoulos... Where's Astopoulos?
- Right in front of you. - There.
- Thank you, sir! - Take care of it.
Batissier!
Hey, don't shove.
- 5 pounds, Batissier... - I want more.
Am I an idiot? A pound less.
- Oh sir, that was a joke. - Well played, Lavigier!
That's enough, Talimard..! Behave yourself.
- So you want your five pounds or not? - Thank you, sir.
Didier please!
Sir, if you'd pay Morin now, we could go!
Drop it!
Björn please.
Are you coming on the trip to Margate this afternoon?
I can't. I'm meeting Janet at the Amusements.
I told Lawn I'm going fishing with my English family.
It's true love! Taking her back to France?
Well... my parents... you know...
Luckily she hasn't mentioned it.
Well, great.
See you!
Dear Papa, my stay here is going very well.
Mrs Stonebridge is very nice.
Yesterday I brought her a jellyfish from the beach.
I told her that in France we cooked and ate them.
She cooked it with carrots and onions.
Mrs Stonebridge was very excited.
She went to sniff it then ran to dump it out,
it smelled so bad.
I have nice English friends and am making progress.
May I have some money to rent a bike?
It won't be a waste.
Love and kisses to you and Mama.
- Got a date, Morin? - Getting hip in England, huh?
Wait till I call your father.
"Mr Morin? I'm Julien's English teacher. Your son learned a lot in England!"
So what? You can make out at any age.
We'll be watching you at the movies.
Happy fucking, Morin!
All day long he plays pinball
with the change he stole
from his father's pockets.
He's grown so tall.
Has he any idea at all what he wants to do in life?
To think he was so nice when he was small.
One day he had cigarettes in his satchel.
And his mother found magazines hidden under his table.
He's grown so tall.
Has he any idea at all what he wants to do in life?
To think he was so nice when he was small.
Tomorrow I'll tell Maurice all about it.
What do you think of Janet?
Nothing.
She's not cheap, and she has nice breasts!
Think so?
She isn't dumb, though?
I don't know... I haven't talked to her.
Let's take off?
OK.
You're an asshole!
Son of a bitch!
Bastard!
What happened? Swearing won't help. Are you hurt?
- Yes. - Where?
Let me see. Your eye? Show me your eyes!
- Sorry! It wasn't on purpose. - I should hope not!
You little jerk!
Take him to the locker room and have a nice shower.
I have to take roll call and go to the beach. Mind your manners!
It's hot... stop!
Stop it!
- Idiot. - Me, a jerk?
My mother sold what to the Germans during the war?
Seen Janet?
Who needs her?
Cut it out... I had a date with her at 2 pm.
- She didn't show? - How did you know?
Now she won't meet your folks. Come with us!
- Here! - No, I'm already drunk.
- Groovy, huh? - Yeah, groovy!
- And you? - What?
- Hey Julien! - What?
I got an idea... let's take them with us.
Hey Morin! Want some ice cream?
Yes, please.
How about my broad, huh? Beautiful, huh?
I practically own the store. Her name's Rosemary.
I make Rose merry!
Did I hear that Janet ditched you?
To hell with her.
- Hey, guys... I fucked Maureen! - I don't believe you.
Yes! Just now, behind the dunes! Man, is it good!
Show me your hands.
Yeah, it's true! That's fine, son.
Well... back I go!
My dear Julien, your letters give us great pleasure.
Your mother and I congratulate you on your progress
in English. You're right, it's important
Here's the money for a bike. Don't waste it.
Money has to be earned.
Julien, you coming?
- You got a letter? - Yes.
Me, a jerk? My mother sold what to the Germans during the war?
Uh, no!
Me, a jerk? My mother sold the Germans during the war?
You'll never get it!
- Hi. - Taking over?
You're all she talks about.
Meet a couple of pals. Fred.
- Hi. - Michel.
Hello girls!
Shit, we've got to go... Come with us?
Well...
- And you? - Yes.
Hello guys!
- Who's that? - That's Chris!
And Janet?
Not so hot!
I'm in with a bunch of jerks! A club for mama's boys!
What did she say about me?
If you're stuck on Janet, I can live without her.
Well, now I understand England!
I've figured it out.
Shoot, Julien, shoot!
Shoot finally, buddy!
In Le Vesinet, I'm the Spanghero of this game! But football, not rugby.
Where is Le Vésinet?
It's a suburb of Paris.
Le Vésinet sucks.
You mean a chic exurb!
Full of sharp cars like Matras, Maseratis...
Zap! Another goal! Julien, you play like a real clod!
What does your father do?
My dad runs a garage. What's so funny?
- Up my what? - I didn't say that!
- Me, a jerk? - My mother sold what to the Germans during the war?
Maurice, you're getting a beard.
Well, I've got to split. I'm meeting Maureen.
Dig that old biddy.
I bet she thinks it's artistic!
What a bunch of jerks!
I'm cutting out... tell Janet.
What did she say?
She wants to stay.
I've had it... I'm cutting out. Come on, let's take off.
- How do you do that? - Just like that!
What about Janet?
Sticks to me like glue. I'm seeing her tomorrow.
Trampolines!
- You know how? - Watch!
What a bunch of jerks!
I'm really starting to dig you. I've really got the hots for you.
Cool it!
My friend, I'm older than you are!
She says she likes you, too.
I'm beginning to wonder if I'll ever learn English.
I don't have any problems with that.
Morin's guy isn't bad.
Maybe I'd do better with German.
Your mother sold what to the Germans during the war?
Hey, look at that!
The sun's really hot.
- See? I'm getting a tan. - Not as tanned as I am.
I bet Morin's got a hard-on.
Turn!
Shut up! You're making me have accidents.
You can't steer!
When you see a car coming, you spin out.
Turn! Turn!
No... it's your fault!
No.
Come on!
Keep going.
Shit, I'm not a bad-looking guy!
Great blue jeans!
That Julien... he's a jerk, isn't he?
No, he's not... in fact, he's a good guy!
Not going steady, are you?
Fuck off! Why don't you just call me a queer?
We've wondered about you two.
Because you're dumb jerks! He doesn't come on with airs,
even if his father is an ambassador. So just shove it!
Like we said... Going steady.
Dumb jerks!
Hi!
Where were you? I've been waiting an hour!
My mother sold what to the Germans during the war?
Come on, forget it... let's split.
I'm sick of it. I have nothing special to wear
- to go see Janet! - Your jeans are great!
These ones? Worn, torn and forlorn...
Trade for my Mickey Mouse socks?
Your what?
Those? You character!
Janet's going to break up...
I don't see why.
- Say, that's Janet's guitar! - It's wasted on me.
- It's pretty. - It's yours.
No! Janet gave it to you, not to me.
Listen to you. First the jeans, now the guitar.
Anything else you want to steal?
Batissier, Juvenelle, Gurnemove...
Mr Gurnemove is absent again? Inadmissible!
Always the same ones who miss swimming and tennis!
Tell your little pals it can't go on!
Tell me, Julien, what are you up to? We don't see much of you.
What peculiar pants you've got on! Did your mother buy them?
I was just on the beach, no one's there.
Of course not! It's 2 pm... Can't risk indigestion.
You didn't go in?
- Hi Maurice, okay? - Hi, yes fine.
Jean-Pierre's jeans?
- Yeah... great, huh? - Not bad.
Yeah, you know.. Janet's guy.
Couldn't you go for Janet's guy?
To wrap it up, let's improvise... okay?
Juvenel! This isn't nursery school... stop drawing!
That's better.
Those who've been missing swimming and tennis
can tell us what they do instead.
Tell us about yesterday, give the others some ideas.
- Any volunteers? - Me, sir!
All right, Picolet.
I was at the Amusement Park and hit the jackpot...
At least speak English!
Too bad... you won't know the rest.
Too bad... Anyone else? Another volunteer?
- Me, sir. - Batissier, good. In English.
Shit, how do you say...
Batissier, skip the anatomy lesson!
Simply tell us what you did yesterday but without the superfluous details.
Sir, what does that mean "I fucked her"?
Class is over for today... Out!
What does that mean "I fucked her"?
- What is it, Germiaud? - What's "gay" in English?
What's this about?
Leave him alone! Immediately! Get out!
And how many have you done it with?
What's up, Julien?
I've been waiting two hours. Jean-Pierre was to meet me.
He just forgot... it happens. Don't worry.
Come on to the movies with us.
No, I'll wait a while longer.
So long, see you tomorrow.
Morin, you still smoking two a day? One cigarette at noon, one at night?
Mama said smoking was bad for you?
Don't cry, you'll be home with mama soon.
Jerk, it's not his mama he misses...
Does it feel good, getting into his pants?
Leave him alone, Germiaud... okay?
Hey, let's bug Lawn with the song!
Kervelot copied down the words.
The curé of Camaret... His balls hang down...
Here they go again! They're incorrigible!
And he gets a hard-on..!
This is really too much!
Don't you know any intelligent songs?
Do you know what you're singing?
I'll explain, sir! It's a song about...
Germiaud, that's enough! Keep it up and you'll be
on the next boat home with a letter that won't make your mother proud!
Surely you could sing something else! For example... "À la Bastille".
It's not for choirboys either.
Come on, sing along with me. One, two.
Thanks a lot! I've never had a group like this!
Where are we going?
To Margate. The biggest amusement park in England.
Hey! Morin tricked his English "mother".
He told her the French eat jellyfish!
So she tried to cook one. It came out pasty white and stinking!
Didn't she say it looked like sperm?
He doesn't know what that is! Morin's pure.
Pure? You'd have to ask Jean-Pierre about that!
He found you pure, didn't he, Morin?
But did he leave you as pure?
Look... he's got a spot on his fly!
Dirty bastards! What did I ever do to you?
Now what? What did you do to make Julien cry?
You're all very funny!
And there go the other children.
You little morons! Will you shut up?
The curé of Cameret... His balls hang down...
He sits on them. And says "Beg pardon".
They ram him right up the ass.
And he gets a hard-on..!
Come in.
What do you want? You should be on the beach.
You don't look good. Come over here.
It can't be that bad... Sit down.
Is anything wrong?
Come and sit down.
I'm sure it's not that bad.
Want a sandwich?
Too bad they are with salad.
Don't let them get you down.
Is it about the pal you were with the other day on the beach?
How did you know?
You know when you kids talk, I hear it, too.
Don't pay any attention!
But it's a dirty lie!
Jean-Pierre's my best pal. That's all!
That's all? It's terrific! It's marvelouus to have a real pal.
Not to be alone. It's nothing to cry about.
But I don't know where he is!
Don't worry, you'll find him.
Go down to the beach and go swimming. You'll feel better after. Okay?
Thank you but I don't feel like it.
Morin, stop shaking like that or you'll never win.
I've lost my last penny. What time is it?
- Take it... - What time is it?
- We don't punch a clock. - What time is it?
- It's midday. - I'm late for lunch.
Say, you don't look so good.
You seen Jean-Pierre?
Yes, he's behind the dunes with Janet, but...
Hey Julien!
Julien, we're here!
You look awful! What's up?
Where were you?
With Janet... Haven't you ever been in love?
Can the other guys be right? Are you just a nice little fairy?
Want to kiss me?
Are you crazy! Dirty little gay!
Did you see that, Janet? You see the jealousy bit he pulled on me?
You queer!
Come on, come on!
Here!
Come on, Talimard!
Here!
Ah, well done.
Well saved!
Shoot!
Dear Jean-Pierre. It has turned cold in Herne Bay.
I've seen Janet since you left. She gave me your address.
I was mad at myself for fighting with you.
I hope you're not mad any more. Anyway, I'm sorry it happened.
Are you working the harvest in Brittany?
I'd like to try it, too if I'm still invited.
But why don't you come visit me in Auvergne?
You'll see, trout and crayfish aren't bad either.
I know my parents will say yes.
If you can't come, I'll see you back home.
Le Vesinet is very close to Paris.
Sir!
Why are you out here?
You're frozen.
Come on home with me, we'll have some tea.
I understand what you've just told me.
It'll all work out, you'll see.
- Feel better? - Yes... a little.
Still frozen, aren't you?
I'll put some whisky in your tea.
It's strong!
Hey, Morin! Want some?
Come on, Morin... have a drink!
What's going on? Are you down, man? A drink'll pick you up.
No.
- Sure, it'll pick you up! - I'm not thirsty.
- I bet he is thirsty. - It'll do you good.
It's good!
- Fuck off! Leave me alone! - It's good!
Come on, it tastes good.
Come on, Morin!
Leave me alone!
- Thank me or I'll kiss you. - You're crazy!
Why? You do it with Jean-Pierre.
No!
Make him say what his mother sold.
Tell us what your mother sold to the Germans.
This is ridiculous!
- What did your mother sell? - Bastards!
- Say it. - My mother sold..! My mother sold..!
My little Julien, I couldn't come get you in Paris.
I had to got to your poor Aunt Sybil's funeral.
Look at your report card. It's not exactly brilliant.
I've left you 20 francs to have dinner out.
Don't miss the train tomorrow morning. You're so absent-minded.
Love and kisses... your Papa.
Newspaper, Madame?
I need a coffee.
Gave me indigestion. They charged me 2000 francs for my little dog.
He's not even 6 months old. Children ride free up to 6 years old.
Young dogs are as delicate as young children.
Isn't that so, Madame?
He doesn't even get a seat!
Did the young man take it?
I'm sure if you ask him nicely,
he'll let you sit on his lap.
Won't you, young man?
Young man! Do you want him on your lap?
There.
He'll be fine when he gets used to you.
Don't be afraid.
He's a very nice boy.
Young people now aren't as bad as the papers say.
I'm not saying that they're all nice. Some of them aren't nice at all!
He's a very nice boy.
Very nice. An honour to your sex!
- Is this a smoking compartment? - Yes!
Did you have fun, dear?
Did I get any mail?
Just your report card and your father was furious.
Particularly about the note from your maths teacher.
That prof's a skunk, isn't he?
Gérald brought a friend from the university.
A certain lack of class, but charming.
Lionel has great fun with them.
Your father thinks he's good for Gérald. Your sister's son is giving her trouble.
It's Julien!
My little Julien... you've grown!
Papa.
- An English accent! - Papa, you always exaggerate.
You've grown, Julien.
He knows... Papa already told him. Come meet Gerald's pal... he's funny!
He's my pal, too.
- Hello. - Apéritif, Papa?
Yes.
Thank you.
Do I offer one to Julien?
Of course! He's now a man of the world.
A man who has travelled and now speaks good English.
Julien, just to please me, speak English for us.
Edmond, leave the child alone.
Julien, just to please your mother, go and rest.
That's very nice of you, I'm really touched.
Did Cedric have a good trip?
Yes, and it's restful at my in-laws' place.
The air on the Atlantic is so good.
Auvergne has the purest air.
A bit cold and damp, but pure.
And their water can't compare. We're at the source,
our water is even bottled.
But the cure just tired Cédric.
And Lionel teases him too much.
I work better than Cédric.
Lionel, that's nonsense. Cédric is only four.
And children don't speak at table.
At 4, I worked better than Cédric.
My little roughneck.
There! Mama's defending Lionel! Shall I be frank? Lionel is a brat!
You're spoiling him so completely. Gérald and I weren't spoiled.
I had no bike, I didn't eat with you.
We two ate first, with Miss Marcepoile. We ate eveything
that was put in front of us.
Miss Marcepoile was cute.
So cute that I never got dessert.
At lessons, she'd rap my knuckles!
I've never told you about that!
We weren't so unhappy!
Not you. Her favourite! But she detested me!
An unhappy childhood, my darling?
Poor Sylvie. Were we that mean to you?
Yes! You were very mean to me!
You know I'm tired. It's too unfair!
"An angel passes..."
It's true, Sylvie is tired.
And you, Jean, were you unhappy as a child?
Any brothers or sisters?
A brother who's a painter, and a sister
who's still in school.
Your brother paints?
He paints houses... it's better than spraying cars!
He earns good money.
Sorry, I hoped to ease the tension. My brother's a student, too.
The table can be cleared. We've finished.
I haven't finished!
Next time you won't be so slow.
Julien, do you want the paper? A letter for you.
"Why don't you come visit me in Auvergne?"
"You'll see, trout and crayfish aren't bad either."
Lionel, play somewhere else.
Yes!
"I know my parents will say yes."
"Hi! Your letter really broke me up.
"I hope you've gotten over your fit."
Julien, we're waiting for you.
I'm coming.
"I have an upset stomach,
"French cuisine after English feed!"
"That's great."
"It's marvelous to have a real pal. Not to be alone."
"Are you all right?"
"Well, enjoy your vacation. Jean-Pierre."
Hook the meat on like this.
Julien, come help us.
Show Jean where to fish... not too far away, though.
Is this good?
No, not in mid-current!
I've never fished for crayfish.
Really?
Yes... Show me how.
- This is perfect. - Why?
It's calm and deep... after a cascade, the water's clean.
If you say so.
Let's check the others.
- They biting? - Yeah, yeah.
- Caught any? - No, but I'm going to.
- Never. - Be quiet! I'm fishing.
Shit... a hole!
"Your jeans are great! Trade for my Mickey Mouse socks?"
"Your what?"
"Those? You character!"
- "That's Janet's guitar!" - "It's wasted om me."
- "It's pretty." - "It's yours."
"No! Janet gave it to you, not to me."
"Take it."
Leave me alone.
Who, me?
You don't understand.
What?
The letter?
You're still here!
Catch anything?
Let's split.
- Who taught you that? - Jean.
Time to go. Where are they?
- Don't ask me. - Let's go.
Jean-Pierre doesn't understand.
Want to help me out? Tomorrow's your mother's birthday.
Damn! I completely forgot!
I don't know what to get her.
There they are!
Jean and Julien!
I picked the whole garden.
You're welcome.
- And Papa. - Thank you... Well, we're ready!
We bring you this bouquet to celebrate your birthday.
It could be prettier but we hope you like it anyway.
You shouldn't have! I'm being spoiled rotten.
And all these flowers! They must be put in vases to keep them fresh!
It's adorable!
Oh no.
Is that from you, Edmond? What's that? For me?
Oh! That's wonderful, thank you, darling!
I want to put it on.
All day long he plays pinball.
with the change he stole from his father's pockets.
He's grown so tall,
has he any idea at all what he wants to do in life?
To think he was so nice when he was small.
One day he had cigarettes in his satchel.
And his mother found magazines hidden under his table.
He's grown so tall,
has he any idea at all what he wants to do in life?
To think he was so nice when he was small.
They said at school he would end up as a vagabond.
Perhaps as a musician... Anyway, nothing good.
He's grown so tall,
has he any idea at all what he wants to do in life?
To think he was so nice when he was small.
He's grown so tall,
has he any idea at all what he wants to do in life?
To think he was so nice when he was small.