THE CHILD OF MAN
From the novel by JANIS KLIDZEJS
In the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Amen.
Thank you for this day, Lord,
but no sooner do we have lunch and it's dark.
I met a squirrel in the forest.
He said "Take this to Bonuk."
- Give it to me. - Here.
What's more...
I also met a bear. He asked me how his friend Bonuk was.
I said he was well and learning scripture.
Sure, but ask him to recite some and he's useless.
Who cares? the priest is my friend.
Because he christened you?
No! We stole apples together.
God is watching you!
It's true! You'll see when he comes.
Behave, son. Don't shame us.
You mustn't embarrass us.
- What are you doing? - The same as Father.
- Sit up properly. - You too.
- Look what you did. - Poor bread.
Why? Does it hurt?
Bread is a gift from God and we must treat it well.
What's in the news, Alexander?
A cow on the rails in Riga stopped the tram.
Make way!
We grown-ups are going for a ride.
You little ones have to wait here.
I'll get you for that, Pauline!
I won't marry you! You're old and ugly.
- Who will you marry? - I'm marrying Bigi.
A fine pair you'd make. You're only up to Brigita's navel.
It's not Brigita, it's Bigi!
I'll get you, you rat.
Bigi doesn't have a navel. She's Different.
Everyone has a navel, including Brigita.
It's not Brigita. It's Bigi! Bigi! Bigi!
- Give up? - Men don't fight with women.
Don't budge. Mother told you to learn the St. George liturgy.
So start learning.
Learn how to save your soul. Off you go.
Must you make your prayers so long, St. George?
Why must I suffer? Can you hear me?
Hey, George. Are you listening, George?
This is men's business.
What would you know about women?
You have a lot of growing up to do.
Shush. Keep quiet.
Studying hard, I see?
Do you know that your soul is as white as snow?
Even if Tancis's moustache is stiff, it can't pierce a soul.
On the other hand,
a devil's tail can slash it to pieces.
- That's not true. - It is.
- It's not! - It is so!
It's very rude to eavesdrop.
Jesus and Mary! You will burn in Hell!
See what passion does to you?
Zuze...
Where is my soul?
Your soul? It's inside you.
Really? Mixed in with meat and cabbage?
All mixed up with pork and peas?
It's easier to conquer a dragon than a woman, my friend.
St. George...
please lend a hand so I can control these sheep...
my aunts.
- Can you keep a secret? - Men always keep secrets.
You won't tell anyone what you heard, will you?
I won't.
Thank you, St George.
Greeting, Tancis.
Still at war with the women?
Just Malvine.
- Sadly, you're outnumbered. - Yeah.
I'll drop by tonight. Let's see if I can help out with your friend.
Please come by.
We ought to take the beauties for a ride.
- I'll be waiting, my friend. - You said I'm your best friend.
Sounds like Tancis is.
Tancis is my oldest friend and you're a real friend.
- Hi, Tancis. - Greetings, Bonuk.
- Tancis... - What, my friend?
How many friends can a man have?
- The more the merrier. - No really.
Just one.
Will you be my friend until we die, Tancis?
Until we die?
But I'm older. I'll die first.
Are you going to die?
Everyone dies. You will die too.
Every single one of us will die?
What will become of the world without us?
- Help me, men! - Go and help your friend.
How childish.
No, we won't die.
Doctors will invent medicines and people will live forever.
Where are you, Bigi? Did the wolves eat you?
Did thieves steal you away? I'll wait for you until daybreak.
Bigi, you're alive!
Thanks for the mittens. Your beloved's hands won't freeze.
I'm waiting for you.
Good evening, neighbour.
- Is the farm hand inside? - Yes, inside.
Have you seen Bonuk?
- Where? - Go in.
- You waited for me, Bonuk. - Yeah.
You're still my dearest friend.
"Till death do us part..." but we'll never die.
Ask me once again, Bigi.
- Ask what? - You know what.
Are you still my dearest friend?
Yes, till death do us part.
Come inside, you'll freeze.
Your mittens keep me warm. I'll stay outside.
Why don't windmills fly away with those things that turn?
Good evening, one and all.
Propellers?
That's it! Propellers!
I'm glad you didn't take Pauline for a ride.
I will spend his money, yes indeed!
- Who will spend whose money? - You!
That Malvine is a witch. She neighs like a horse.
It's time somebody broke her in.
I would marry John tomorrow...
If only he would ask me!
Will we see a wedding between you and Alex, Bigi?
Well? Is there going to be a wedding or not
Tell us. Yes or no?
Nothing is definite yet.
Don't wait too long or someone else will nab him.
He's such a fine man.
I'd steal him from you.
Hold on to him, Bigi
He's like an oak. Hard working, wise...
A farmer and landowner.
They say he has a good head on his shoulders.
He was the first villager to buy his own farm.
He did it all by himself. He had no help from anyone.
But he neither drinks nor smokes.
Peter, please read us the story about Genevieve.
Yes! Where are you, Peter?
Come here, Peter. It's a lovely story.
- It always makes me cry. - It's so true to life.
It was on my mind all day.
"...and they reject it.
"Only farmers who are aware of the correct crops to sow...
" and those who have suffered losses..."
Genevieve slept for a long time.
When she awoke, she was alone in the forest with her child.
A terrible storm tore at the trees.
Poor Genevieve prayed to God.
"Dear father in Heaven..."
Bonuk Paulans.
I am Bonuk Paulans.
I call upon you to join the fight against evil.
Alex means nothing to me. You are my dearest friend.
Let me go!
Why are you here amongst these sheep,
with your tail between your legs?
I'm leaving.
We will wait for you.
Give me your sword, George.
Here's Bonuk's cap.
Genevieve fell to her knees
and bathed her feet in the pure, hot tears of her love.
Poor girl. What a tragic fate.
It's so sad.
That's so beautiful.
It cleansed my soul.
- Where's my friend Bonuk? - Asleep?
Yes, love like that only exists in novels.
Hold on, Bonuk. Is that the priest?
No, it's Lanky Peter.
Hi, Paulans. I was passing and I thought I'd drop in.
- Hello, Alexander. - Hello, Peter.
It's been a long time.
I dropped in to say hello. After all, it is Lent.
Would the girls like a ride?
How about it? Let's go for a ride.
Yes, let's go for a ride.
How dare you.
Do you take my mother for a slave?
Who will tend the cattle while you run around with boys?
While Grandfather's alive, it's his decision.
It's up to him.
Bring the horse out, Bigi.
Just don't touch my rug.
You may go for your ride. Enjoy yourselves.
Hey, Tancis! How come I didn't see you before?
Race him up the hill.
Beat him, then Lanky won't be able to show off.
Giddyup, Cicers.
Come back!
Jesus and Mary, thank you!
I'm going to ride with you and Tancis.
Carry me over to Tancis.
You and I will stay behind, Alexander.
You're so strong.
Let's get Solomon. girls!
Leave her alone! Don't touch Bigi.
- Glory be to God. - Forever, amen.
Forever.
- Do you know me, son? - Sure, we stole apples together.
Jesus and Mary. Have you gone mad?
It's all right. Do you know who I am?
- Sure, who doesn't? - Mind your manners!
It's all right. Come closer.
When and where did all this take place?
At the house of the woman with white hair.
Your sister.
Now I remember. It did indeed happen.
Two young boys ran up to me, bowed and said...
Glory be to God.
"Forever." I asked their names.
Bonuk Paulans, son of Alexander.
I asked if you wanted apples.
Which boy doesn't?
I went to my sister's place and she thought it was thieves.
- Shall we go inside? - That was the apple story.
Lead the way. Tell me what you have learnt.
Tuck your shirt in.
I must visit many children today.
It gets dark early during winter.
In summer I can do it quick as a flash in my car,
but in winter, with my horse...
Don't boast about your car, Father.
Cicers is faster.
- Cicers? - A horse.
- Faster than a car? - Yes, Want to bet?
Shake on it.
You be the witness, Grandfather.
What was the bet?
Friendship.
What have you learnt and what's your favourite?
O Virgin Mary whom we adore.
May we always feel your presence with us.
You are in out hearts and we love you.
May your grace forever bless us.
Who's that, Grandfather? He looks so big and dark.
It's Alex Dakulskis.
Where are is horns and his tail?
- Bigi, ask me again. - Ask you what? What is it?
You know what.
- Are you my dearest friend? - Till death do us part.
You've pricked yourself.
You pricked your finger.
I'll make it better. This is a special herb.
It's for when you bleed.
It will make it better. Just hold it tight.
I'm off to milk the cow now.
By the time you're married it'll be all better.
Dear God, Paulans!
This is independent and free Latvia!
And you want to buy clay plates?
We're no longer peasants. We're part of Europe.
This is the dinner set Alex Dakulskis bought.
- Get it for Jazups' visit. - If Alex got it, so must we.
From the mouths of babes comes the voice of truth.
Come, come. I'll show you.
You mind the shop for me.
Good morning, Miss.
Hello.
What are you up to?
Stealing lollies?
Oh, Mr Kazacs.
Take another look at it.
- We'll think about it. - Take your time.
I'll keep it for you.
Wait, I have something especially for you.
Take off your cap, Bonuks.
You saw how it happened, dear Saviour.
I didn't mean to steal the knife.
I'll just keep it for a while and then I'll take it back.
- Are those flowers for me? - No, for the Saviour.
Take off your cap.
How god-fearing your son is, Regina.
What are you up to out here every night?
I'm washing my feet in the dew.
It used to be a battle to make you wash.
Keep washing. Good.
Seems you're no longer a baby You're becoming a young man.
Bigi.
Did you hear that?
I've become a man. I'm no longer a child.
Dearest Bigi.
Who's that chirping like a bird?
Do you think she'd notice a twerp like you?
Please don't talk to me like that or something bad may happen.
To me? Come and have dinner now.
- Eat it yourself! - Shall I tell Grandfather?
You're old, warped and ugly.
You're a fleabag, Malvine.
A fleabag, am I?
I'll show you!
May all my fleas dance on your back!
Just you wait.
Why are you panting like a dog, Bonuk?
I was racing with Malvine.
You must teach him to come to dinner on time.
As a suitor, he must listen to his beloved singing each night.
Brigita is crazy.
Leading the boy on so he thinks the impossible may happen.
Don't call her Brigita. Her name's Bigi, Bigi, Bigi!
Do you like Bigi?
Actually, I want to marry her.
Girls.
Tell us why.
Because "y" is a crooked letter and can't be straightened.
Good response But why not marry Pauline?
I won't marry her!
- She wets the bed. - How do you know?
Her mother asked mine for some medicine.
- It is a problem. - I understand.
A wife that wets the bed is not a good thing.
No, not good at all.
But worst of all...
Mother will think I'm the one wetting the bed, not my wife.
That's the nuts and bolts of it.
I understand. Nuts in mattresses are bad.
Go to sleep now.
You swim like a girl.
Your hips sway.
My hips don't sway. Have you ever seen girls swim?
Tancis has.
Girls go flip-flop.
They thrust with their hips.
- I'm taller. - But I'm stronger.
Let's measure our willies, Bonuk.
- Don't move. - It's not me, it's the water.
Let's go to the bank.
- Cheat! You stretched yours. - No, I didn't.
I have what I have.
Just because yours is a bit of string...
What? Whose is like string? Do you want to bet?
For shame! For shame!
Godless, unchristian creatures! Now you'll get it! I'll get you.
Go away! Can't you see there are naked men here?
Shameless boys. I'll tell everyone.
Tancis, Bigi, Grandfather, everyone!
- Shame on you. - Don't you talk about shame.
You'll burn in hell. I'm going to tell everyone.
Wait.
Now she'll tell everyone for miles around.
We won't be able to show our faces.
What are you skunks up to?
- Let's cut a deal, Pauline. - What deal?
If you don't tell anyone we'll let you hang out with us.
It's a deal.
Not so fast. Kneel down.
Calm down.
Please kneel and swear an oath, Pauline.
Fine.
Swear on your honour and in the name of God.
I swear on God and my honour never to say I saw you naked...
or that I saw you measuring your willies.
Amen.
Stand up. We're done.
No, we're not. Now, it's your turn to swear.
- Kneel, Bonuk. - No way.
I'll give you a hiding.
You kneel too.
Look up to heaven.
Hands together.
Turn to Saint Anthony, lord of thunder and lightning.
Now swear... Almighty, holy Anthony.
I swear by all your lightning...
I will never pick on Pauline again.
I won't put frogs down her back.
I wont call her an old bag...
a dog, a chook or any other animal.
I will always take her along
when we go stealing peas, riding, in the woods
and everywhere we go.
Amen.
Now we're done. You may go.
I'll take the secret with me to the grave.
What have we here, Ziks? Visitors?
Ziks.
Come here.
Keep the sheep out of the wheat field.
Sit!
You'll get a special treat tonight if you do a good job.
This horse will bring in the gold.
Bonuk. Keeping fit?
Fit as a fiddle.
- How's life treating you? - Fine. Thanks for asking.
I helped Father plough last spring.
- What about the sheep? - Ziks can do it.
I'm not a shepherd.
Men work in the fields, not with sheep.
Do you want a sweet?
I'm not a kid. Why waste your money?
Thanks a lot.
Lydia!
My you've grown!
It's been a year since I last saw you.
You're even more beautiful.
- Like it? - Say thank you, son.
I've always wanted one of these
Let's use the new dinner set.
Flowers.
- Here, Malvine. - Put it in a bowl.
Bowl!
This is for you. The other men have got theirs.
You must have paid a lot.
These buns are so good they melt in the mouth.
Do you like them?
- Reminds me of your wedding. - Really?
Yes.
Who's tending the herd for you, Bonuk?
Do you hear me?
Malvine, the eggs.
- Lydia! - What's up, Bonuk?
Out of all my father's sisters you're my favourite.
You're not like those other sheep.
When I think about your wedding, I just want to cry.
Does Jezups treat you well?
Yes, he's nice.
If he doesn't he'll have to deal with me.
You just have to say the word.
Put it in the dish.
Where on earth do I put the eggs, Malvine?
Let me go!
You can do them! At last.
Ziks.
What are you doing here?
- He doesn't recognise me. - He only obeys me.
Where's your post, Ziks?
Back to the sheep!
See?
I'm no shepherd. That's dog's work.
Albert's isn't a horse, it's an ass.
Do you want to come home with me, Ziks?
- My horse is a champion. - Can I have Ziks?
Ziks?
Jezups, dear brother-in-law!
No problem. My house is your house...
and my dog is your dog.
Oh dear!
Easy, Malvine.
Bonuk.
Wake up, Bonuk. Get up, the herd is waiting.
Meanwhile, someone took your dog away while you slept.
What?
Where are Lydia and Jezups?
Have they gone?
Thieves! Thieves! Thieves!
My Ziks, bagged and carried off like a pig to market.
Shame on you. She bought you a cap.
They're thieves.
I bet she stole this too.
That will teach you to trust relatives.
Don't talk like that.
What sort of a guard dog are you? They stole your friend.
Show some respect. Lydia's not your age.
- She's a married woman. - Sure, sure.
Some woman! That's a laugh.
Last year, she couldn't even do a somersault.
Thieves.
Beggars!
Who's a beggar?
Our new relatives, that's who!
They can't be, word has it they're rich.
Rich? They go around stealing everyone's dogs.
Everyone's dogs? What for?
For skins or conserves?
What are conserves?
It's sort of like... It's like chopped meat in tins.
Some people eat dogs.
What?
Ziks is a friend. How could they eat him?
Do you think Ziks has been...
No, they need to use him as a sheep dog.
So they can't be beggars.
- What about the rest? - The rest of what?
The dogs they steal.
Canned and sold in Riga where people gobble them up.
Don't tell anyone.
It pays to have schooling.
Canned food, how smart.
But why dogs?
Well, we are Latvians after all.
We're not cannibals.
Try to control you anger and forgive you enemies.
They're worse than enemies.
You're own relatives!
What did Lydia do? They didn't have a dog.
- Let her do her own barking. - Now son.
Sin is mans greatest enemy.
Sin? What does the commandment say?
- Thou shalt not steal. - Correct. Thou shalt not steal.
In the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.
Dear Lord, in the name of all that's holy
I will return the knife.
I wont keep it much longer.
As you well know,
a child who tends sheep needs a knife.
He needs it to slice bread, to make a whistle...
Please forgive me.
Jesus, last summer you took my daddy.
But that's all right.
It's very hard for me and Mummy.
I don't complain. I'm not afraid of work.
I tend sheep for a neighbour.
We have a debt and he wants to sell everything we own.
Every single thing.
Fat Kazacs wants to take all our land.
Dear Lord, how can we move away from such good friends?
Bonuk, Peter, Justs...
- You heard? - Yes.
That's the way it is. How can we leave this place?
All the fields are in bloom.
the rye is ripening.
Did you know the Virgin Mary walks in the fields at night?
She's like a cloud.
Whatever she touches blossom and ripens.
Everything turns green.
Anyone can see her.
But they must be without sin. That means little girls.
- Have you seen her? - I'm a sinner.
But I'm hoping to see her Once she listened to me.
- Remember the heatwave? - And?
It started to rain.
- Why was that? - I prayed to St George.
And St Anthony.
No. I prayed to the Virgin Mary.
No, it was me with George and Anthony.
No, it was the Virgin Mary.
Since when does the egg teach the hen?
Stop squeaking like a rusty wheel.
Be brave. Don't be afraid.
Don't slouch like an old man.
Sit up straight.
Keep your back straight.
How like a woman!
They always scream before they fall.
I want to do it again.
- Haven't you had enough? - No.
Thank you. I swear to God, it's not true.
The boy made it all up.
Dearest wife, what sort of child have we raised?
- How embarrassing. - What's the matter?
Where's that rascal Bonuk?
The village talk is that my sister steals dogs,
kills them and puts them in those things...
- Tin cans? - Yes.
Jesus and Mary!
I always said you should spank him more often.
What are you laughing at? He's your friend.
Jesus and Mary! He said it about Lydia?
Our angel, who can't stand to see a chicken die?
Fancy spreading rumours like that about our Lydia.
Sure but she eats the meat.
Mainly the wings, so she can get a husband and fly the coop.
Now you'll cop it! Grab him.
"Honour thy father...
and thy mother."
Fine, but what about when they treat their kids like dogs?
Bigi.
You go flip-flop too. All your weight is there.
Come in for a swim, Bonuk.
I don't want to.
Get undressed.
What are you staring at?
Everything you've got is exactly like Malvine.
And Zuze. You've even got a navel.
You're just like any girl.
- You peek at them? - We bathe together.
That's okay then.
Good. Now don't worry.
Don't worry. I'll stand guard for you.
I can't live at home any more. I'm leaving.
I want you to wait for me.
I'll come back when I'm big and rich.
I'll come back with my horse and my dog.
But you must stay faithful to me.
Goodbye, my true and faithful friend.
Goodbye to the rest of you too. I forgive you...
for you know not what you do.
In the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.
Help me, Blessed Virgin on my long, long journey.
It could be a robber...
I bet he's a highwayman.
Good morning.
You're out early, wanderer. Are you a shepherd?
- No. - Whose son are you?
Alexander Paulans's son.
I know your father. He has three lovely, unmarried sisters.
You played at Lydia's wedding.
They say you're a good musician.
It's obvious you come from a good family.
God bless you. May you grow big and strong.
- By the way, what's your name? - Bonifacijs.
Bonuk for short. And I'm Izidor.
It's nice to have met on such a lovely morning.
Walking through life alone, I look up and there's God,
with birds below,
and coming towards me a child of man.
That's you, Bonuk. I'll remember that.
- Now I know you're Bonuk. - And you're Izidor.
That's wonderful. I'll play for you.
Listen so you can hear and look so you can see.
I could have drowned.
Wolves could have gotten me.
No one would have wept for me at home, Godfather.
Have something to eat. Workers must eat well.
You're going to be a real worker.
I only had daughters but now I'll have a son.
Your godmother...
who is my wife, has gone to church with your cousins.
How do you feel about looking after the cows for me...
while I tend the land?
When Lydia and Jezups visited us...
Mum didn't ask them to do any chores.
But they were visitors and you are now my son.
Well?
Take this.
Crazy animal.
With women it behaves like a cow should.
If a man goes near, it kicks, flicks its tail and headbutts.
It must be milked or the milk will sour in the udder.
You know, we had the same problem.
Once Grandfather was alone at home and had to do the milking.
He was faced with that problem.
- But he solved it. - How?
Come here.
Clever man, Bonuk.
Two heads are better than one.
How do I look?
A bit hairy and a bit squarish,
but fine in God's eyes.
And now with God's help...
Godmother, be brave!
Godmother.
Nice cow.
Hold the tail.
Darn the silly thing!
- Did I fall in manure? - No, it's milk.
Devil's witch.
Listen. Bonuk, not a word to anyone.
Everyone will laugh at us.
Deal?
Sure.
Tend the cows now.
When Godmother gets back she'll rejoice at having a son.
Will you be living with me now?
Your mother said you left home.
Get them out of the turnip patch.
Leave the newspaper and help.
- Hi, everybody. - How are you, Anton?
New shepherd, I see.
How did you find me?
The clan is getting bigger.
Here, this will come in handy.
Thanks, Peter.
Let's sit down before the journey.
We'll come out of the station, cross the tracks,
cross the river, up the hill...
I'll make them give him back!
Up you get, cows. I'll be leaving you soon.
I'm going on a long trip
to rescue you master Ziks.
You must fend for yourselves.
Men's hands are needed on the farm.
How did you find your way back, Ziks?
You were so far away.
Tell me how.
You could tell by the sky!
Nowhere else looks like this.
Nowhere else sounds like this, or is as green as this.
Right, Ziks?
My captain once owned a dog.
It swam all the way from the Kuril Islands.
When the captain reached shore the dog was waiting.
He took the dog with him to Petrograd.
It was such a clever dog.
This dog...
in Petrograd, would buy the newspaper for its master.
Then it would read the paper
and it would point out the political bits with its snout.
I can believe it read the paper...
but not that it carried money!
That Kazacs wants to kick Pauline's mum off the land.
- May I? - I'm barefooted.
- Is that Kazacs, Grandfather? - Yes that's him.
Is he the one?
- He's always got flat tyres. - He's so fat, it's no wonder.
- I don't like him. - Me neither.
- Look at his hair. - He's with Zuze.
He's even dancing!
Let's slash his tyres.
- How did you get such a knife? - It's mine.
And you call yourself a friend?
It's settled. I've been to see the ranger.
I can pick it up next week.
Let's go, Peter.
Looks like trouble, everybody.
Ladies' choice.
- Let's go. - It's ladies' choice.
Go away, you brat.
- What's the meaning, boy? - Alex...
You're old, ugly, and cloven-hoofed.
So there!
That's the way it is, Ziks.
Bigi won't be seeing the Virgin Mary.
Only people without sin can see her.
You haven't sinned.
Perhaps you'll see her one night.
Don't frighten her with your barking.
Be sure to tell me about it in the morning.
Hello there. Did you want something?
Here, Mr Shuskins. This is yours.
- Mine? - Yes.
In spring, I was here and it fell into my pocket accidentally.
And you've come to return it?
- Yes. - Who told you to?
- The Saviour. - Whose son are you?
The son of Alexander Paulans.
Bonuk Paulans.
Here, take it. I know your father.
He's a man of honour. You keep it.
- Thank you. - Hi, Mr Shuskins.
What's going on?
Come on, kids. Have some.
Wait.
Hello, Mr Kazacs.
Pauline's mum's debt is to the parish, not to you.
Just look at Pauline.
As young as she is work doesn't scare her.
She tends herds and earns money.
When she grows up she'll earn more and pay back the parish.
So why are you meddling in this?
Aren't you afraid of the wrath of God?
Think of your soul.
Widows' and orphans' tears will turn into Hell's fire.
You'll wriggle like a fish on a hook and suffer endlessly.
Who are you?
Are you a lawyer?
I'm a child of man.
You're a dung beetle.
Police!
Long live Jesus!
Forever and ever. Amen.
What a lovely smell.
As Solomon says, it's the smell of culture.
"The rusty door opened with a horrible squealing noise.
"It was blood curdling.
"It seemed as if it would wake all the dead in the morgue.
- "The coffin lid..." - Shush. Look.
- He's going to Pauline's. - Looks that way.
She'll have to leave before long.
We're going to have to think of something.
Let's go.
See? They floated away by themselves.
No one can blame me for it.
He's asleep.
In the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.
Our Father which art in heaven,
Hallowed be Thy name. Thy kingdom come.
Thy will be done...
Dung beetle.
Jesus and Mary!
Holy Mother of God!
You won't get away from me.
I've caught you like a fish on a hook.
Wake up, Bonuk.
We've sinned.
We're going to burn in hell.
It can't be. Dead people don't talk.
Let's see what the fuss is about.
Damned river! I'll set this place in order.
Don't just stand there and stare, you old bags and no-hopers!
Got nothing better to do?
- Here's one. Good man. - Thank God, it's Kazacs.
Have a drink.
- Hey, you. - What?
Have you seen my bike?
No.
Who are you?
Which farm are you from? Answer me.
Thank you, Lord, for not making us sinners.
Thank you, but is it fair that a walking sin like him is spared?
- What's all the fuss? - Okay, what's faster, Mr Priest?
Horse or car?
What was that, son?
Glory be to Jesus Christ.
- Forever and ever. - Do you know me?
Yes, I do. I do indeed.
- I'm Bonuk Paulans. - Bonifacijs Paulans.
Yes, we made a bet last winter.
Well, a deal is a deal.
Stand alongside me.
Let's go!
Don't look now but you're in a ditch.
Now who's smarter? The horse or the car?
Well, I'm the stupid one.
It serves me right for racing with a young boy.
Now listen, son. Your eyes are better than mine.
I dropped my glasses and without them...
I stuck my head out to see how far behind me you were...
As I did...
Found them!
Thanks, son.
- Which is faster? - Give them to me.
- The horse is faster. - Which is smarter?
A horse is smarter than the car.
Here you are.
Thank you, my son.
- This is for your trick. - Thank you.
That's one lats.
Approach, little girl.
I think I've seen you before.
You're Pauline, the widow's daughter.
I know you. I gave you full marks in Scripture.
Work hard and study hard. We need educated people here.
We really need them here but she has to go away soon.
Why?
Because that Kazacs gets fatter on the tears of orphans.
He won't even drown properly. I hope lightning strikes him!
Hold on! Wait a minute.
That's up to God. Tell me how man can help.
I'll tell you exactly how things stand.
- Hold me tight, Peter. - I won't let you go, Malvine.
Try and get on again.
- Hello, Tancis. - Hello, my friend.
- Where are the handles? - They're pedals.
What an idiot.
No hands, Peter!
Why are you flicking the brim?
When I get a good idea...
I flick the brim...
then I put the cap on my head...
and I can say what I want and the thoughts just flow.
I've got a hat exactly the same as yours with a brim.
A woman gave it to me. Do you think it will work?
Which woman?
Lydia, the one who stole my dog.
I see. One way or another women always spell trouble.
When I look at you you're like any other man,
but when you see Malvine you act like a sick puppy.
- Really? - Yes, really.
And she has exactly the same look.
She's not that way with Lanky Peter.
What's this about Lanky Peter?
When he does this...
she looks like a lioness protecting her cubs.
You're a true friend, my friend.
So is that how it is?
- Thank you. - Sure.
Why do your pants look like a red rooster?
That's no colour for a man.
I don't like them either. Just last Saturday...
as we bathed in the sauna
those silly goats kept saying how lovely the pants were.
I see. So you still bathe with the old bags?
What? What a dreadful thing to say!
I wouldn't be caught dead bathing with them.
To the sauna, Bonuk. the menfolk are finished.
Off you go, don't be late.
I'm not going anywhere.
- I don't want to! - Will you do as you're told?
- Not this time! - When did you get so smart?
When I had to look at your big, ugly back in the sauna.
Ugly back? I'll get you for that!
Just wait and see.
Open up. Let me in.
Wait until I get my hands on you!
We'll put a vegetable patch here.
What's this? Sodom and Gomorrah?
Get out of there.
Leave him alone, Malvine.
He's old enough to understand now.
- What does he understand? - I understand that...
I don't want to have to look at your... things.
Aren't you ashamed of yourself? Listen to him!
Off you go, girls before the steam gets cold.
The boy's crazy.
We'll see about that.
Malvine didn't you say that Tancis's moustache
is as stiff as a brush and it burns you after you kiss?
I refuse to go to the sauna with him.
Anna, you said
Janis's hands are as cold as a frog's on your boobies.
- Didn't you? - Big mouth.
And you said Anton has a hairy chest, Zuze.
It's so hairy you could knit a jumper with it.
He's godless. I've never seen anything like it!
And you...
I ought to give you a good hiding.
But it's Sunday tomorrow.
We'll discuss it later.
Your life won't be worth living now, boy.
The women are going to eat you alive... without salt.
- Hello, Bigi. - My how you've grown, Bonuk.
You'll be going to school in autumn.
Can you dance yet?
Not very well. Pauline doesn't want to teach me.
Come on, I'll teach you.
The most beautiful girl I'll take for a wife.
We'll live happily the rest of our life.
Bigi... Let me lift you up.
Stop it, it tickles.
I could have done it if you hadn't laughed.
I'm too big.
- How's you wedding gown? - It's ready.
My dearest friend, Bonuk
I've come to invite you all to the wedding.
You'd be Pauline's partner. Would you like that?
- Why don't you answer? - Answer Mother.
Come here, Bonuk.
One day I'll show them how useful an axe can be.
Get up. Go and kiss your mother's hand.
Forgive me for leaving you.
Thank you for everything, Father.
Dear friend.
Many thanks to you all.
The cheek of the Paulans girls. Short sleeves to church!
It would never have happened in my day.
Hurry up!
Slow down!
- Who's the evil-looking man? - Which one?
- With the cloven hoof. - Which one?
- Next to Bigi. - That's Alex.
Where are his horns and tail?
Are you prepared to procreate with the blessing of God?
Yes.
- He's marrying them. - How do you know?
The priest asked them to say "I do".
Bigi too?
- Yes. - So, I guess it's...
Can't they have fun without drinking?
How can we sweeten things up. Alex?
Let's see some sugar!
Give us some sugar!
More sugar!
Is that the best you can do?
Practice makes perfect.
Wait, Bonuk.
Have you heard the news?
Pauline's mum won't be evicted.
And who do we have to thank?
- My friend, Bonuk Paulans. - Not me, the priest.
That's my godson!
Come sit at the table.
How you've grown, Bonuk.
You'll start school in autumn.
I love it when you twirl me around.
Don't waste you time looking, Solomon.
The cloven-hoofed one ate everything up.
Who would that be?
The evil-looking one.
I'll give you sweets if you don't tell Tancis what you overheard.
Don't worry. I'm not an old woman.
Tancis.
I've saved some sugar for you, Bonuk.
I'll give it to you if you don't tell Peter what you overheard.
You won't say anything, will you?
Don't worry. Rest at ease.
I heard a good joke.
Why do politicians wear fur waistbands?
To keep their ankles warm!
Izidor is seeing the couple off already. Hurry up.
What's the idea, Bonuk?
I can't go out there alone.
I'll look like a widow.
What will people say?
Rest.
Go ahead, we'll catch up later.
Dearest Mother of God...
Mother of God, help Bigi-Brigita and Alex.
I no longer want to stab him.
I don't want him to drown.
Holy Mother, when the wheat flowers and blooms
please bless Alex's fields so that he always has bread.
Do all in you power to see that Alex is kind...
and see that he doesn't drink or hit his wife.
Don't wake him.
Let him grow.
Subtitles: OrionPax 2005/2006